Let Adults be Children

When I was younger, I used to look forward to Easter. Oh, the candy. The Cadbury eggs. The Easter egg hunts. The whole rabbit thing used to freak me out a bit – perhaps I’d read Bunnicula one too many times times because I always imagined the Easter Bunny as having soft white fur, but these giant red eyes. Also, the idea of a rabbit being stealthy was also a little weird. Despite that, I still ate his candy. And I still found his eggs.

It was the start of Spring – the time where I would make mud soup in my mom’s garden, spending so much time outside. It was a time of freedom, and safety with my mom.

Now that I’m adult, I look forward to Easter too. Since I’m Catholic by association, I look foward to the end of the Lenten season in order to do whatever it was that I gave up. In this case, it’s alcohol. There have been several trying situations when I’ve really had to think about my motives. Many times, when I drink, it’s just to get away from thinking about something, but most of the time, it’s just to have a few extra laughs with friends. Therefore, I look forward to knocking a few back after Easter. Or, maybe, on Easter, what are the rules around that?

I think that our lives as adults would be considerably happier if we were just allowed to do one child-like thing a day. Something that would bring you back to a time of comfort and solace. I noticed, when I picked up a 4-pack of Cadbury Eggs at Target, I felt this profound sense of gladness coupled with sadness. I was my own Easter Bunny. Where is the magic in that?

I feel sorry that children have to grow up and stop believing in those magical things.

Instead, we have to believe in belief systems, and socialized rules, and we have to believe in corporate messaging. Instead of Tic-Tac-Toe, it’s Cee-Eee-Ohs. There is no magic in a corporate environment, instead, most times, I feel like a robot zombie who has no control over their own destiny.

I miss magic. I miss my family. I miss having hope in my career. I’m still a child at heart – afraid of getting lost, afraid of the dark.

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