The Confused Valentine

14 Feb

I’m always a little schizophrenic when it comes to Valentine’s Day.

In January, I approach V. Day as a nuisance, it’s stupid to spend so much money on flowers and overpriced under-quality chocolate when all you need to say is “I love you and I’m thankful for you in my life.” All you need is a voice and a hug to say this. Maybe a little more creativity too, but it doesn’t have to get too crazy.

Then, all the marketing starts to get to me as February approaches and I start to think, wow, flowers are pretty. I like chocolate. I know it’s horrible and monstrous of me, but I start to feel entitled for some gift of expression because I am in a relationship.

To any man I’ve ever been in a relationship with during this time, it’s surely very confusing and I feel for them. The most elaborate gift I have ever received for Valentine’s was a very beautiful diamond necklace from my first boyfriend in high school. We’d been dating for about two years at the time and some of it was long distance (he was four years older than me.) I proceeded to break up with him almost immediately after he gave me the gift. He made me keep the necklace and I never saw him again. I still feel bad that I did that to him, but he was in college and shouldn’t be saving himself for a 16-year old four states away. I didn’t have feelings for him other than friendly ones. It was the most gracious break-up I’ve ever had.

So, I tell Jim V day is silly, but yet I still anticipate something from him. Poor man. I got excited this year and got him a giant beer glass (I’m talking this thing stands up to my waist) and I filled it with some truffles and a flower. He got so excited when he saw this beer glass when we were at Gordmanns one day, and I just knew I had to get it for him. Because I want to see him get excited. I just wish he got excited about getting me something too – but I know it’s hard for him because of the mixed signals I’ve sent.

The most important thing – I love him, and he loves me. I’m the luckiest to be so loved.

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One Response to “The Confused Valentine”

  1. missingrose February 16, 2010 at 10:59 am #

    O.. I totally feel you lady!.. 🙂 *HUG*.. damn you commercial marketing people!

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